initiative

i always play this game with my brodie when we were younger. see who will carve in first. for e.g., if we quarrel and have a cold war, i wont want to talk to him till he talks to me first. and i think i almost always win.

fast foward 20 years later. but its not in relation to my brodie but with friends now. you know how sometimes you can be on msn the whole day but no one will talk to you. i dont think it s due to the fact that i am a miserable loner. but are friends playing the waiting game? like what i played with my brodie when we were young?

i dont like to have to try hard for things to work out. i can be nice and try for several times. like i ll take the initiative to ask about your day, ask how you are getting by lately. but if its going to be a one-way traffic, fuck off then. i will stop wasting your time.

there are also those friends who will only msg you with favors. on one hand, you can feel honored that they thought of you. on the flip side, just think that you are being made use of. like how t will almost only msg me when she needs favors. if not i wont hear from her.

head is aching from work!!!